Category Archives: Womanhood

Fearfully, Wonderfully

Psalm 139:14
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Your works are wonderful I know that full well.

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Fearfully, Wonderfully

My sista
There was a time in my life
When I hated
the nappiness of my hair
the darkness of my skin
the curvaceous ness of my body.
I wanted
To have silky hair
Be light skinned
Be tall and thin,
But God reminded me that
He designed me for a purpose
His awesome purpose.
So stop flipping through
The pages of those beauty magazines
Look at the likeness that is yourself
And announce
I am made
Fearfully!
I am made
Wonderfully!

My brotha
There was a time in my life
When I despised
the shyness of my persona
the meekness of my manner
the altruistic ness of me.
I wanted
To be audacious
Be out-going
Be self-fish,
But God showed me that
He created me for a purpose
His divine purpose.
So stop flipping through
The channels on the television screen
Look at the reflection that is youself
And proclaim
I am made
Fearfully!
I am made
Wonderfully!

God has uniquely crafted each
and
Everyone of us
According to His will
According to His perfect plan
So stop trying to be
like and
Sound like and
Act like and
Look like and
Dress like and
Walk like and
Talk like
Everyone else.

Be the salt in this
Tasteless world that God has called you to be
And
When doubt and
Fear and
Jealousy and
Envy and
Depression and
Hatred creep into the
inner self of you
Hold your head up high
And declare
With the kingdom authority
I am made
Fearfully!
I am made
Wonderfully!

* Crystal Awkward 2010

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Be God’s Valentine

Yesterday was Valentine’s Day (USA). This is my first year as a single woman, which hit me on Saturday. The couples had a fellowship at my church on Friday night and my parents went. On Saturday they showed me the pictures of the couples who attended. I was happy that my parents had a good time, but later that day sadness sunk in, but only for a moment. Satan tried to make me believe that I was lonely and depressed because I’m not in a relationship right now, but Satan is a lier. In that moment he tried so steal my joy, but the joy of the Lord is my strength (Nehemiah 8:10b).

God reminded me that He loves me and that right now is not the time for me to have companionship. Don’t be discouraged if you didn’t receive flowers or candy or confessions of love. Just remember that God loves you, He loves you unconditionally. His love for me means more than all the chocolate kisses, heart candy, and huggable teddy bears. If you didn’t have a Valentine, just be God’s Valentine everyday by obeying His commands. Be Blessed.

Done lost my mind

It feels like a slap in the face, when the Holy Spirit convicts you or at least it did for me. During a counseling session with my Co-Pastor, she told me that I had put GH in God’s place. What?! I didn’t realize that I had done this nor did I do this intentionally. Earlier this year the Holy Spirit told me not to trust GH, that I should trust God. At the time I thought, I should be able to trust my husband. When he says he’s going to do something, I should have faith and believe that it will get done. God in all His infinite wisdom and knowledge knew that GH was going to fail me and God warned me, but I didn’t listen. Be careful that you don’t put people or things ahead of God. Now if you do, when the Holy Spirit convicts you, repent and be quick to put God back where He belongs. Keep God first in all you do. Be blessed.

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Done Lost my Mind

OH LORD!
I can’t believe I done lost my mind
Put that man on Your precious throne
Wanted to put all my trust in him
And he kept on failing me
Kept getting upset but I
Could not see that he was not the one who could
Supply all my needs.

OH LORD!
I can’t believe I done lost my mind
Put that man at the head of my life
Wanted him to lead me
And he led me astray
Kept getting angry, but I
Would not see that he was not the one who could
Direct my path

OH LORD!
I can’t believe I done lost my mind
I thank you for loving me unconditionally
Even though I didn’t keep my mind
Stayed on you
I’m sorry
I got my mind right now
I’m ready for You to be my Lord and Savior again
Thank you LORD.

 ~crystal awkward 2009